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"Captain Hero's Marriage Pact" is the eleventh episode of Drawn Together.

Storyline[]

Captain Hero gets a visit from his "backrub buddy" UFG (Unusually Flexible Girl), who turns to him for rebound sex every time she's dumped. In the middle of having sex, UFG reminds Hero that while at Superhero University, they agreed to get married if they were both still single when they turned 30. As it turns out, it's UFG's 30th birthday, and she expects Hero to fulfill the pact. Hero panics, especially when he learns the next morning that UFG is in love with him and has been holding out so that she could marry him. Hero enlists Wooldoor to tell UFG for him that he doesn't intend to marry her; UFG has a breakdown, and so frightens Wooldoor with her fears about dying alone that he agrees to marry her so that he doesn't have to face that fate either.

Meanwhile, Foxxy sees a "where are they now?" special on TV that features The Foxxy 5, her old band from the 1980s. Learning that the world considers her and her band to be has-beens, Foxxy takes offense and declares that a comeback is in order. She tracks down her old bandmates, and they celebrate their reunion with a night of heavy drinking and passionate activity. The next morning, Foxxy learns that her bandmates were killed in a hit and run car accident, and that she's the only survivor because she left early. With Spanky acting as her producer, Foxxy records a tribute song detailing her bandmates' grisly demise, and the song becomes a smash hit which revives her career. When she goes out to the garage, however, she discovers the twisted, still living remnants of her bandmates embedded in the grill of her van; she was so drunk that she didn't remember plowing them down. Realizing that if anyone finds out, her comeback will be ruined, Foxxy leaves them in the garage to die. However, her attempt to turn Spanky's farts into another hit single is met with a stern lesson from Spanky about integrity. She concedes that Spanky is right, and goes out to the garage to make it up to her bandmates, but it is too late. The band members have escaped with the van, and eventually they end up recording a song of their own, trumping Foxxy's comeback.

Ufg

Unusually Flexible Girl.

Hero, realizing now that he can't have UFG, wants her, and subsequently plots to sabotage her marriage to Wooldoor. He dresses up as Wooldoor and urinates on UFG, but it turns out that she's into urophilia, and she becomes even more enamored of Wooldoor. When Hero reveals that he was the one who urinated on her, UFG decides to go back to Hero; however, now that Hero has her again, he no longer wants her. Hero goes to Wooldoor to ask him to take her back, but after a big argument, they both conclude that neither of them really wants her. When UFG finds out, she becomes despondent and runs out crying. Hero and Wooldoor, now unable to have her, both want her again. Confronting her in the backyard, each grabs one of her arms, and they engage in a tug of war with her.

In the living room, Clara and Toot (who until now had been absent from the episode) emerge from the basement, where they've spent the week building a high-powered potato gun. They fire it off, and the force of the gun propels a potato through the wall of the house and into the backyard, hitting UFG squarely in the face and killing her. Wooldoor is upset that his and Hero's actions led to UFG's death, but Hero notes that since he and Wooldoor were holding on to UFG's arms when she died, that meant that her one great wish was fulfilled: she didn't die alone. Wooldoor decides that this makes him and Captain Hero wonderful people, and they go inside, leaving UFG's corpse in the backyard with a potato embedded in its face-- but the "potato-face" develops a smile and a wink, to show that UFG died happy.

Musical number: "Crashy Smashy Die Die Die," an upbeat song (in the style of "La-la-la-la-labia") in which Foxxy pays warped tribute to her bandmates. Its music video features Foxxy wearing just a thong and cavorting with a snake in a burnt-out city full of car and plane crashes. After the remaining band members escape from Foxxy's garage, they record a song of their own, an R&B-style song called "Drunk A** B***h".

Characters[]

Major Roles[]

Minor Roles[]

Musical Numbers[]

Lyrics to "Crashy Smashy Die Die Die"[]

DTMPfmv

Foxxy's comeback video.

Foxxy: Splattered 'cross the hood, bloody guts and pain! (Crashy smashy my oh my!)
Compound fracture, punctured lung, bashed in brains! (Crashy smashy die die die!)
Crunchy cracky smacky wacky - all that's left
Is best friend puddin' topped with asphalt death...
Hey crashy smashy... (Another statistic!)
Crash and die! (Crashy smashy my oh my!)
Crash and die! (Crashy smashy die die die!)
Crash and die! (Crashy smashy my oh my!)
Crash and die! (Crashy smashy die die die!)
Tumblr ljjmrgfI7o1qeueszo1 500-1-

The Foxxy 4 entangled in the van

Lyrics to "Drunk Ass Bitch"[]

Note: although only the first line is featured in the episode, the entire song is on the soundtrack.


That drunk ass bitch ran us down with her hoopty (Hey hey hey)

That bitch is bunk, now we's jammed up in this trunk (Drunk ass bitch, hey hey hey)

That ho-back skank dang got crunk we got ganked

Now my small intestine's twisted all up inside the gas tank

That drunk ass bitch ran us down with her hoopty

Bitch, bitch, drunk ass bitch (Hey hey hey)

Memorable Quotes[]

"Uh, no offense Foxxy, but you've been washed up, dried, and lightly starched."

(Ling-Ling laughs really hard)

"Ling-Ling always appreciate dry clean humor."

- Xandir and Ling-Ling

"Oh, Captain Hero, I missed you more than a retard misses the point."

"... What do you mean?"

- Unusually Flexible Girl and Captain Hero

"Well, Wooldoor, duty calls."

"Um, does that mean you're going to sleep with her, or make a poopy?"

"If all goes well, both."

- Captain Hero and Wooldoor Sockbat

"Have you noticed we haven't been getting any screen time this week?"

"Well, uh, Duh! That's because we've been in the basement this whole time, making this awesome potato gun!"

- Princess Clara and Toot Braunstein

Notes and inside references[]

Foxxy5

The Foxxy 5.

  • The Foxxy 5 is said to have hit the charts in 1984. Given that Foxxy's age was given at 23 in the first season, this would make her two to three years old at the time this occurred. The most obvious explanation for this is that cartoon characters don't really age, and thus Foxxy is 23 no matter how long she has actually lived.
  • This episode takes place around late December/early January since Ling-Ling is seen alone at his birthday party. In the episode "Super Nanny", Ling-Ling's driver's license gives his date of birth as 1/1/04. Since UFG turns 30 in this episode, it is possible she and Ling-Ling share the same birthday (depending on whether it had passed midnight when she told Captain Hero it was her 30th birthday "today").
  • In Season 1, Captain Hero's age is given at 28 but it appears two years on the show have passed as in this episode he is around thirty years old in order for his and UFG's pact to be fulfilled. This is supported as in Xandir and Tim, Sitting in a Tree he mentions living around "thirty some odd years now" making it consistent.  
  • This episode reveals that Wooldoor's full name is Wooldoor Jebediah Sockbat.
  • Captain Hero says that he's married to his work, and "possibly a Philippino transvestite in Albany. Oh, that was one crazy Yom Kippur!" This is the second time a crazy Yom Kippur celebration has been mentioned, the first being in "The One Wherein There Is a Big Twist, Part II", when Foxxy sees Wooldoor's aborted fetus (obviously by the other castmates) and recalls that it was the result of a crazy Yom Kippur. This is ironic as Yom Kippur is a period of cleansing to seek forgiveness for wrongdoing, not to party.
  • Whilst planning their wedding, UFG and Wooldoor argue over whether the latter's parents' names should appear on the wedding invitation, despite it being established just three episodes prior that Wooldoor's parents are dead. This marks another instance of the show's disregard for continuity.
  • UFG's mother's name is Unusually Jewish Woman, providing yet another Judaism reference in the series, as well as referencing one of comedy's most used stock characters, the Jewish mother.
  • After being absent the entire episode, Toot and Clara suddenly appear at the very end of the episode and comment on how they haven't been getting any screen time this week. This is an in-joke in that both characters are voiced by Tara Strong, whose voice work in this episode was largely devoted to voicing Unusually Flexible Girl. However, Executive Producer Bill Freiberger has stated that Tara being Unusually Flexible Girl "didn't affect Toot and Clara in the episode. There was nothing for them to do in that story so we just added them into the ending." On a similar note, Freiberger stated that "The number of lines Toot has doesn't affect the number of lines Clara has (or vice versa). We have four hours with Tara Strong each week to record her lines. But Tara's so good at what she does that it rarely takes more than two hours to record the most Toot/Clara heavy shows. And we'll usually throw in a couple of guest characters for her as well (when you have someone that good you might as well take advantage of the situation, right?)."[1][2]

Goofs[]

  • When the news reporter states that the Foxxy 5 members are dead, the hats and tails of the members can be seen at the crime scene. However, when Foxxy discovers the van with the band members embedded in the front of it, they all have their hats and tails.
  • Foxxy Phat speaks with a low, gruff tone when she talks, but whenever she says "Hey, hey, hey" her tone is different.

Cultural references[]

  • Ling-Ling watches Bukkake Chef and complains that the secret ingredient is always the same. In Japan, bukkake is a method for preparing noodles, but it shares its name with a form of Japanese pornography in which a woman is ejaculated on by numerous men. It is implied that the secret ingredient is semen.
Ufgfight

Hero and Wooldoor fight over UFG.

  • The character of Unusually Flexible Girl is based on a number of superheroes who have the ability to bend and stretch their bodies, such as Plastic Man, the Elongated Man, Mr. Fantastic, and Elastigirl from The Incredibles. and She Looks Like a Winx Club Character
    • Elastigirl provides probably the clearest parallel; the way UFG moves when she gets out of the taxi and approaches Captain Hero is almost identical to the way Elastigirl left the scene after meeting Mr. Incredible for the first time. Additionally, UFG's obsession with Captain Hero and her desperation to get married can be seen as a twist on the domestic bliss Elastigirl enjoyed with Mr. Incredible.
    • In the same way that Captain Hero's visual look is largely based on Bruce Timm's animation of Superman, Unusually Flexible Girl's animation style is very evocative of women from the DC animated universe, particularly around her eyes.
    • Unusually Flexible Girl's outfit is based primarily on that of Power Girl, with a large cutout in front to show off her cleavage.
  • The show Now Where They At? is a parody of the "Where Are They Now?" segments of various music/nostalgia shows. The host of Now Where They At? is based on disc jockey and voice over actor Casey Kasem.
  • During the first catfight at Club Foot, Foxxy Dark says "Drop it like it's hot", a phrase popular within the hip hop community before being popularized in a song of that title by Snoop Dogg.
  • The tattoos on UFG read: "I'm holding out for a Hero", "I (heart) Hero", "Rent Memento", and "I'm marrying Hero", with the final 'O' formed by her anus. "Rent Memento" refers to a movie where the main character covered himself with tattoos to remember important things. "Holding Out for a Hero" refers to a 1984 hit song by Bonnie Tyler.
  • As Hero enjoys a backrub from Xandir, the scene cuts to a pink train entering a mountain tunnel. This is a reference to a movie convention where the train entering the tunnel signifies the two characters in question having sex. However, in this cutscene, the mountain tunnel is too small and red liquid is coming from the jammed tunnel - most likely implying characters having rough, anal sex.
    • The show also spoofs this convention by revealing that the train clip is just part of a movie Hero and Xandir are watching. This is similar to a Monty Python sketch in which we see a man and woman first embrace and fall back onto a bed. The camera then cuts to a sequence of stock footage which doubles as sexual metaphors (volcano erupting, rocket taking off, train going into a tunnel, etc.) before finally cutting back to the couple to reveal that all of the footage was actually just movies the man was showing the woman.
  • Unusually Flexible Girl says that Wooldoor's pee cured her athlete's foot. There is a widespread belief that urinating on your feet will cure your athlete's foot, a belief which Madonna has espoused on The Late Show with David Letterman. The treatment's effectiveness is widely debated, however.
  • Though she speaks other words during the catfight, Foxxy Phat generally only says "Hey hey hey!", which was the catchphrase of both Dwayne Nelson on What's Happening!! and Fat Albert, though her vocal inflection is more reminiscent of Nelson's usage of the phrase.
Potatogun

Toot and Clara's potato gun.

  • The information block at the end of Foxxy's music video reads:
Foxxy Love
Crashy Smashy Die Die Die
Seriously: F.U. Gary Gray
  • This is a reference to the rap music video director F. Gary Gray. Gray once called Drawn Together "the worst show ever" in a BBC interview. [3]
  • At certain points in this episode and in "Captain Girl," the show briefly cuts to a distinguished-looking British man (voiced by James Arnold Taylor) in an armchair clad in a smoking jacket who utters some short dialogue transitioning from one scene to the next. This is a reference to the series Masterpiece Theatre.
  • The episode makes another Star Wars reference when Foxxy attempts to write lyrics to her song, but all she manages to put down on paper is "Foxxy + Lando Calrissian" written inside a giant heart—referring, of course, to the character played by Billy Dee Williams.
  • The scene in which Foxxy discovers her bandmates embedded in the front of her van is a reference to the case of Chante Mallard. [4]
  • When Wooldoor becomes excited that Captain Hero no longer wants to marry UFG, he does a celebration dance in the style of The Ren and Stimpy Show, specifically the "Happy Happy Joy Joy" dance from the episode "Stimpy's Invention", complete with the inkblot backgrounds seen frequently on Ren and Stimpy.
  • Among the locations that UFG's body travels through after she is hit with the potato are a crime-riddled urban street in an unidentified city, Paris (where we see the Eiffel Tower), Egypt (where we see the Sphinx), Russia (where we see St. Basil's Cathedral, an image associated with the video game Tetris), and The Great Wall of China. As she passes each landmark, the background music changes to something representative of that country.
  • In the scene where Unusually Flexible Girl is talking to Wooldoor, she mentions Spring Break Daytona Beach 2003 on MTV.
  • The scene with Captain Hero and Unusually Flexible Girl's eyes glowing visible in pitch dark is an homage to the classic cartoon gag where the whites of a character's eyes are only visible in complete darkness.

Streaming[]

It can be viewed at the official Drawn Together website here.


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